“Men think differently from women,” my wife said recently, then modified her assertion by adding, “At least you think differently from me.” We had been discussing an e-mail message that I had sent to our architect about the final accounting from our contractor. First she had written a draft of the e-mail, then I had reworked her draft, and then she had revised mine before I finally sent it off. In the process, while tightening her prose, I omitted a sentence that she had thought important, and she had not caught its omission when reviewing my draft.
Whether or not men do think differently from women, it’s clear I think differently from my wife, who is more diffuse in her writing than I am. I try to use a minimum of words. If I’m not the strong silent type in speech, I try to be in prose. But I’m glad we think differently. I’d hate to be married to someone like me.
Besides, the two of us make a whole, each correcting the biases and blind spots of the other, each supplying the other's lacunae of memory. It’s not a right-brain, left-brain distinction I’m making here. Both of us have verbal as well as non-verbal skills, but even so, what I lack my wife often provides and vice versa. Each of us supplies the counterweight for the other’s excesses or lacks, steadying the boat so to speak of our marriage. We are fortunate in each other. The day will come, though, when one of us will have to manage without the other’s help and support. May that day be far away.
2010-2012 Anchises-An Old Man's Journal All Rights Reserved
I know what you're talking about. My wife and I have complementary talents: I like to be decisive whereas she agonizes over choices; I am analytical whereas she is intuitive; my writing style tends toward the florid, hers to the austere. But in each of our respective endeavors, we both depend upon the other daily. We are fortunate in the same way you and your wife are, and are all too conscious that, as you say, "The day will come...when one of us will have to manage without the other’s help and support."
ReplyDeleteWhen you pray,"may that day be far away", I cry amen and amen!